My Long History of Fearing Shots

I haven't necessarily had the easiest life, although I wouldn't change anything for the world. I give a lot of credit to parents for raising me to be a strong (sometimes a wimp), assertive (sometimes too assertive) and confident (sometimes too confident) young lady despite my differences.

I was born with one leg shorter than the other and had 16 surgeries between the ages of 6 and 15 and one last one when I was 25. Although doctors were able to lengthenn my leg, it didn't grow at the same pace, hence the multiple surgeries. I spent a majority of my childhood wearing a lift on my shoe so I could at least walk normal and have a normal life.

(That's me in the picture with my younger brother to the left and my two older cousins. You can see the lift on my left shoe.)


Through all my surgeries, I was never bothered by IV's or getting my blood drawn, but I was terrified of getting shots. I swore there were times when the needles from the shots made it all the way to my bone. They were horribly painful. The shots that were supposed to calm me down before a surgery caused me more anxiety than the surgery itself. And since I couldn't swallow pills and I refused to get shots, I actually chose to drink smashed up pills mixed with water. Yuck!


Needless to say, the IVF teach session caused me some added anxiety. All the needles for the injections and practicing had me in cold sweats. Do they really think calling them injections is nicer than saying shots? Is it like asking someone if they like your new recipe and they say it's "different"? What a passive agressive comment - what a hoax.

I tried not to think about the injections until I got home from work yesterday and Mike told me it was time for my first injection. I think I shed a couple tears, told him I was going to pass out and then watched him destroy two needles trying to get the damn things out of the package. At that point, I should have just given myself the injection, but I seriously thought I was going to faint. Perhaps it was looking at the two bent needles that made me queezy.

After my dramatic behavior and successfully delivered injection, I realized it didn't hurt that bad. In fact, I hardly felt it. I did, however, immediately start to complain that I felt a burning sensation and I got a little welt.

Good thing Mike loves me, I was almost annoying myself with my childish antics. Especially since, overall, it wasn't a bad experience. I'm guessing its all in my head. We will see how tonight goes.